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The One With Ross's Teeth

Episode 6.08 - In loving memory of Gail Joseph

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Phoebe visits Rachel at work and makes out with Kenny the copy boy, thinking it's Ralph Lauren. She tells Rachel, who gossips to her boss (Kim), who eventually becomes convinced that Rachel is having an affair with Ralph Lauren in order to get Kim's job. Ross goes too far when he whitens his teeth in preparation for a date with Hillary, Monica's co-worker. Chandler tries to convince Joey that he's letting Janine make him and the apartment too girly.

The one where they said....

Rachel: Just come by at lunch so that my boss doesn't see you, 'cause Kim will just freak out, and she already doesn't like me very much.
Chandler: Oh, that's weird. I don't think my boss likes me either.
Monica: I don't think mine likes me either.
Ross: Maybe it's a universal thing.
Joey: Yeah. Or maybe... it's because you're all hanging around here at 11:30 on a wednesday.

Joey: And what is with the really hot stick in the bathroom?
Janine: It's a curling iron.

Joey: Okay, my towels, for instance, okay? I come into the bathroom here, and my towel is not on the floor, where I keep it. It's up here, on some hook! And it smells different!
Janine It's clean.
Joey: Yeah, well, it... it... it feels different!
Janine It's dry!
Joey: All right, I can make my peace with the clean, dry towels. And okay, also... what is with these chips you bought?
Janine No, no, no, it's potpouri! You're supposed to smell it.
Joey: [smelling] Well, that's like summer in a bowl.

Monica: What happened to your teeth?
Ross: I whitened them.
Chandler: Really?
Ross: Yeah, what... what do you think?
Monica: Well, uh, I think I shouldn't look directly at them.
Ross: Come on, seriously.
Monica: Ross, they're really, really, really white!
Chandler: Yeah, what was wrong with your old... human teeth?
Ross: Well, I did leave the gel on a little longer than it said to.
Monica: How much longer?
Ross: Uh, uh.... a day.
Monica: Ross, you know that tonight is your date with Hillary?
Ross: I know! That's why I did it! Come on, are they really that bad?
Chandler: No. No, no, no, you'll be fine. Hilary's blind, right?
Monica: She will be after tonight.

Monica: Go over to Joey's. Go over to Joey's, and... and drink some beer and hammer up some drywall!
Chandler: You know, when guys hang out, they don't just drink beer and hammer up drywall.
Monica: When girls hang out, we don't have pillow fights in our underwear.
[Chandler is devastated]
Monica: I'm sorry. We do, we do! I don't know why I said that.

Chandler: Now I've upset you? What did I say?
Joey: It's not what you said, it's just the way you said it. Oh my god! I'm a woman!


Credits

Teleplay by Perry Rein & Gigi McCreery
Story by Andrew Reich & Ted Cohen
Directed by Gary Halvorson
Joanna Gleason as Kim
Ralph Lauren as himself
Elle MacPherson as Janine
Missi Pyle as Hillary
Aired 11/18/99, 1/27/00, 6/15/00