Monica takes Rachel to the hospital; Rachel has no insurance, so she and Monica switch identities--a tricky situation that is made worse when two cute doctors (guest stars George Clooney and Noah Wyle) ask them on dates; Monica and Rachel start arguing and end up listing all their worst qualities in front of their dates. Ross worries about whether he can be a good father; he seeks comfort from his friends and advice from his father. Joey continues to date Ursula, which interferes with his friendship with Phoebe--he misses her birthday; however, when Ursula stands Joey up and won't return his calls, Phoebe talks to her and finds out she isn't even planning to tell Joey it's over; Phoebe pretends to be Ursula so she can let him down nicely--a ruse which doesn't last. Marcel chokes on scrabble tiles and has to be rushed to the hospital; Ross realizes he can cope with the responsibilities of parenthood. Ugly Naked Guy has a hula-hoop.
Joey: I'm taking Ursula tonight. It's her birthday.
Ross: Whoa... what about Phoebe's birthday?
Joey: When's that?
Ross: Tonight.
Joey: Oh, man! What're the odds of that happening?
Ross: You take your time.