Phoebe avoids going to the dentist because whenever she goes, someone dies. Joey tells Chandler about Janice kissing her husband, and Chandler confronts her. She must chose between the two men she loves; it looks like she might choose Chandler, but he decides he can't be responsible for breaking up her marriage. Ross has an emergency at the museum, so Rachel takes care of Ben; Monica bangs Ben's head. Ugly Naked Guy has a new hammock, and looks awfully still; the gang fashions a very long poking device out of chopsticks so they can make sure he's not dead. Gunther continues to brood over Rachel.
Rachel: And all these people actually died?
Phoebe: Yes, while I was in the chair. That's why I take such good care
of my teeth now, ya know. It's not about oral hygiene, I floss to save lives.
Ross: Um, can I get a napkin, too?
Gunther: Oh, like you don't already have everything.
Rachel: Phoebe, you're in pain. Would you just go to the dentist? Just go.
Phoebe: Alright, fine, fine. But if you're my next victim, don't
come back as a poltergeist and like suck me into the TV set.
Rachel: I promise.
Phoebe: Although, don't feel like you can't visit.
Joey: If the Homosapiens were, in fact, "Homosapien", is that why they're extinct?
Ross: Joey, Homosapiens are people.
Joey: Hey, I'm not judging.
Chandler: That's a good idea. "Dear Janice, have a Hubba-Bubba birthday."
I would like to get her something serious.
Joey: Oh, you want something serious. You know what you should do,
you should get her one of those, uh, barium enemas. Those are dead serious.
Chandler: Alright. Look, I'm gonna go in here, and you don't buy me anything ever.
Rachel: Oh yeah. Ya know, if it's not a headboard, it's just not worth it.
Phoebe: Okay. If you're alive you answer your phone!
Joey: Ugly Naked Guy looks awfully still.
Phoebe: Oh my God! I killed him! I killed another one! And this curse is getting stronger, too, to bring down something that big.
Chandler: She doesn't know. Says she loves us both. You know, when I woke up this morning I was in love, I was happy. You know it serves me right for buying that twelve-pack of condoms.
Ross: Um, did you notice anything wierd about Ben today?
Monica: No, why?
Ross: Well, I was just playing with him, and ya know we were doing the
alphabet song, which he used to be really good at, but suddenly he's leaving
out "e" and "f". It's like they just, uh, I don't know, fell out of his head.
Monica: Really?
Ross: Oh, and also he's, he's walkin' kinda funny. I mean, it's like his left leg is
moving a lot faster than his right leg. He's in there just sort of, ya know....
Monica: Oh my God, I wrecked your baby!
Rachel (to Ross): I hope it's still funny when you're in hell.
Chandler: You can't leave! I have your shoe!
Gunther: Rachel has those in burgundy.
